Northern Ireland briefly noticed

BRITAIN has briefly noticed Northern Ireland before returning its attention to other things.

Northern Ireland was briefly in the news this weekend following some form of election, forcing millions to grudgingly recall its existence.

Bill McKay, from Colchester, said: “I haven’t thought about Northern Ireland in years. Is that where the porridge comes from?

“They can’t be that much of a big deal because I don’t have a stereotyped comedy notion of people from Northern Ireland that involves shagging sheep or whatever.”

Donna Sheridan, from Reading, said: “Northern Ireland is the one that Spain wants, or maybe Argentina. If push came to shove, I reckon I could find it on a map. But why would I do that?

“Anyway, I can’t think about the constitutional fallout from devolved government being suspended, or the implications of a hard Brexit on the peace process, because I have Zumba later.”