DO they slot it neatly back in with the others or abandon it next to their car? Here’s how antisocial habits can be used to identify life’s pricks.
How they put a supermarket trolley back
There is only one correct way to put a trolley back, and that’s to slot it neatly back into a row of other ones the same size. If you see someone wang it recklessly into the shelter without looking where it ends up, jam it aggressively into one of a different size, or simply push it into the nearest bush, they will be a bellend in multiple other ways too.
If they park on the pavement
Unless it’s some sort of life-threatening emergency, there is no acceptable excuse for parking on the pavement. Do you think your 4×4 twat wagon is more important than people with pushchairs or prams being able to get to the shops safely? Obviously you do, which makes you a prick who deserves to have a massive penis keyed on your precious bonnet to identify you to others.
Whether they put the ‘Next customer please’ bar on the conveyor
It’s the work of a moment to place the divider on the conveyor belt when you’re at the till, and yet some thoughtless, lazy bastards can’t even be arsed to do this very small favour for you. And what’s worse, they’re the type of person who will have a shit fit if one of your carrots violates their box of fondant fancies by slightly touching it.
If they put lids back on things properly
People who can’t be bothered to screw the top back on a jar, meaning you fumble and drop it and get lemon curd and glass all over the kitchen floor, are self-centred, thoughtless pricks. And what’s worse is that you have to live with this one, potentially for the rest of your life. It should be grounds for instant divorce.
What they do with their dog’s crap
Weirdest is the person who carefully bags the poo then hangs it on a twig in the nearest bush. Especially if they do it repeatedly. Nobody wants to see a dog shit ‘Christmas tree’ with turds for baubles. It’s bad but probably not quite as bad as just leaving it, ideally slightly hidden in grass or on a path. Worst, in their own way, are people who leave dozens of turds to fester in their own back garden, ensuring their neighbours can get a good whiff 24/7, the pricks.