A COUPLE’S home has photographs of them together literally everywhere you look, friends have confirmed.
Martin Bishop and Susan Traherne have been together for four years and, according to guests, a stroll around the flat takes you through their relationship practically in real time.
Friend Emma Bradford said: “There used to be one or two. A frame with fun ones they got done at a wedding. Some holiday ones. It wasn’t oppressive.
“But now you can’t glance away from their eager faces without seeing their eager faces somewhere else, staring back at you from Budapest or Edinburgh or Glastonbury.
“They’re in the kitchen. They’re all over the spare room. They’re in the toilet, which is a separate room from the bathroom, goggling at you wearing comedy moustaches while you try to have a crap.
“I don’t think they’re vain people. I think they’re just celebrating their love, but I wish they’d just do it by f*cking.”
Bishop said: “We don’t really like art, or other people’s children, or any bands or anything like that. So it’s just us on every surface until everyone goes mad.”