Friday, 4th December 2020

Five things which used to impress the ladies but now not so much

IMPRESSING women was much easier when gender norms were entrenched and everyone was quite sexist. Here are some strategies blokes can no longer rely on.

Having a car

The man of the past would drive the car while explaining his superb driving skills, fix the car himself, or at least tinker with it, and basically take charge of anything to do with cars. He would never let a lady drive – they felt safe and protected and it avoided them inevitably crashing it.

Giving them an extra £20 for the housekeeping, saying ‘get something nice for yourself’

A common trope in 70s sitcoms, showing both your generosity and openness to letting the woman think for herself. Doesn’t work as well these days, for some reason.


A brute show of strength went down well with the lady you were trying to impress, especially if you accused your victim of ‘looking at your bird’. Men thought that anyway. Less popular now due to looking like a nutcase. 

Carrying four drinks back from the bar in one go

This showed you had big hands, say no more, know what I mean?

Correcting her multiple mistakes and wrong ideas

Economics, international relations, how yeast makes bread rise, the different types of clouds – no subject was too complex for a man to clear up for his confused lady-friend. Knowing you knew meant they didn’t have to, and they were grateful. Still considered a good romantic strategy among idiots to this day.