A THREESOME has been thrown into crisis after it became apparent that one member of the trio was contributing significantly less than the other two.
The three-way evening of erotic delight descended into recriminations after two sides of the troilism triangle realised they were doing absolutely bloody everything and it was far from fair.
Tom Logan, aged 28, said: “Look, I’m not a communist, but has Sophie never heard it’s better to give than receive?
“I’m going at Francesca, Francesca’s devouring Sophie, she’s doing nothing. Or I’m doing Sophie and having to manage Francesca’s delight with my free hand. There’s no reciprocity.
“She goes between my legs and just kind of hovers down there. She kisses Francesca unenthusiastically and doesn’t even bother with her tits. I’m moaning her name not in ecstasy but to try and get her attention.
“It ruins the mood to say ‘come on, put some effort in, we’re knackered over here’ but I’m sorely tempted. I was expecting more than a lazy caress of my back while we’re sweating away. Did she suggest this just for a night off?”
Francesca Ryan, aged 26, agreed: “I’m open to trying again but we need clear expectations, agreed responsibilities, possibly a map and definitely a rota.”
