Monday, 6th July 2020

Revving of car engine makes woman fall helplessly in love

A WOMAN has fallen head-over-heels in love with the driver of a hot hatchback who revved his car at traffic lights. 

Helen Archer, aged 24, was in a long-term relationship she thought was happy but has dumped her boyfriend to pursue the mystery driver of the modified Renault Megane who is everything she desires.

She said: “As soon as I heard the hoarse whine of his engine, I knew I had to make this man mine, whatever it took.

“Women pretend that we care about a man’s personality or physical appearance, but in truth all we want is a man who can press their foot down on a pedal repeatedly while looking around to see who noticed.

“The windows were too smoked for me to identify the driver. He roared away before I could catch his name. All I can do is roam the streets searching for the sound of his engine like Prince Charming looking for Cinderella.”

Driver Nathan Muir said: “Works every time. They hear the aggressive rising rasp of my titanium twin exhaust and the knickers simply drop.

“Unfortunately by that point I’m 300 yards down the road giving the finger to a cyclist so I haven’t been able to take advantage of it yet. Which is why I’ve never had a girlfriend.”