Batteries in remote granted eternal life

THE batteries in a television remote have seemingly been granted eternal life by a force greater than us.

The two AA batteries were bought along with the television five years ago and despite daily use they only require turning slightly every day to keep them amongst the living.

Owner Norman Steele said: “They’ll be here long after I’ve gone.

“In fact, they’ll probably use them to power the thing that’s going lower me into the crematorium.

“Obviously, they’ll have to make sure I’m totally dead first but if there’s a chance I’m not they should rub me gently between their hands and that might get an extra couple of days life out of me.”

Norman’s wife, Mary added: “We haven’t got any kids so we’ll probably end up leaving the house to the batteries.”