DADS are struggling with normality after 24 hours of unbridled self-indulgence.
After receiving incredible gifts like three craft ales in a gift box during a day devoted entirely to them, men are experiencing the oft-reported ‘Father’s Day Comedown’.
Father of two Stephen Malley said: “From getting a chocolate beer mug with my name on it, to being allowed to watch the poor new Die Hard film, yesterday was a non-stop rollercoaster of unbelievable thrills.
“But today it’s like my family are virtual strangers again. I’m even wondering if the ‘Dad In A Million’ card I got was intended ironically.”
Solicitor Joseph Turner said: My daughters took me to a steam fair. I saw men race lawnmowers, I saw monster trucks, I saw a model of The Flying Scotsman constructed from more than 750,000 matchsticks.
“It was the greatest day of my life. But now my world feels like a prison.”
Psychologist Nikki Hollis said: “Getting a card that describes you as the ‘world’s greatest dad’ is an incredible rush.
“Then it’s Monday and you’re not the greatest in the world at anything any more – you’re just a twat with a bad back.”
“Dads must find the strength to keep going with their normal routine. Go to work, have a brief conversation while eating and then stick on Call of Duty until everyone else has gone to bed.”