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Gen Zer forced to explain every word in sentence 'It's giving let the GOAT cook vibes'

A YOUNG person has been made to explain every single syllable of the latest indecipherable sentence they have spouted, it has emerged.

20-year-old Joshua Hudson was taken to task over his most recent TikTok comment which uses recognisable words from the English language yet arranges them in a way that makes little sense.

Confused reader Martin Bishop, 36, said: “I can understand each of the words in isolation. But put them all together and no, I’m utterly lost.

“It’s like being back at school and reading a Shakespeare play. I need a translation on the opposite page with peer-reviewed academic footnotes that explain what the f**k is being said.

“I’m sitting here with a dictionary as Josh goes through the words one-by-one. As far as I can tell, the author is praising the abilities of the protagonist in the face of fierce opposition. Thank God he didn’t mention ‘rizz’ though or I’d be in real trouble.

“I still don’t get how the comment relates to the video though. It’s just a clip of a man weightlifting then Cilla Black starts singing the theme tune to Surprise Surprise. 

“Even more confusingly, it’s got 634,000 likes.”

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Woman referee not going to say what players did wrong

THE woman who will referee a Premier League match next week confirmed she will not tell players what they have done wrong because they should already know.

Rebecca Welch, who takes charge of the Fulham-Burnley game on December 23rd, will award free kicks, yellow cards and red cards without giving reasons because she is ‘not doing the players’ emotional labour for them’.

She said: “It’s not my job to tell you which rules of the game you’ve infringed. If you paid attention, instead of galumphing around the pitch like the big I am, you’d know full well.

“The ball’s not the most important thing in the world. Not everything is about you being the big man and scoring a goal and lapping up the applause, not that you ever notice me and my assistants until you want an opponent booked.

“I don’t have to explain why I’m giving a penalty. I’m not the one who’s in the wrong. If you want to score find an extra yard of space off the shoulder of the last defender instead of blaming me.”

Player Jordan Gardner said: “She has you so tied up in knots you can’t take a single step without worrying it’s the wrong one. I think I’m in love.”

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