Leaving the toilet seat up proves we didn't piss through it, say perfect gentlemen

MEN have explained that they leave the toilet seat up not because they are lazy bastards, but so women can feel confident it will not be covered in piss.

Join Mash Premium today

Subscribe to read all articles, ad-free.

Choose a subscription plan

£0 first month

  • One Month for Free
  • £3 per month thereafter
Start Trial Now

£30 / Year

Better value and makes you superior

  • Unlimited ad-free access
  • Save 17% on the monthly price
Buy Now

£200

Live another 6 years and you're ripping us off

  • Pay once - that's it
  • Unlimited ad-free access
Buy Now

You just can't handle a strong, incompetent, unpopular, bigoted Asian woman, Patel tells Tories

PRITI Patel feels she has only been knocked out of the Tory leadership race because the party is not ready for a strong woman with her awful qualities.

Join Mash Premium today

Subscribe to read all articles, ad-free.

Choose a subscription plan

£0 first month

  • One Month for Free
  • £3 per month thereafter
Start Trial Now

£30 / Year

Better value and makes you superior

  • Unlimited ad-free access
  • Save 17% on the monthly price
Buy Now

£200

Live another 6 years and you're ripping us off

  • Pay once - that's it
  • Unlimited ad-free access
Buy Now