Look how many f**king books I've read, says everyone on GoodReads

EVERY single GoodReads user would like you to look at how many fancy fucking books they have read.

The popular book-sharing site is not, as claimed, about swapping reviews and recommendations, users have confirmed, but is about being a right la-di-dah smart arse.

Regular poster Tom Booker said: “Oh yeah, it’s all about the literary dick-swinging. Why else would we do it?

“Look upon my Read-In-2018 list and despair. Sorry, that’s a poetry reference, so you might not get it.”

When it was pointed out that several of his friends on the site had read more than him in the past year, Booker dismissed them as ‘fucking nerds who need to get a life’.

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Woman going away for two days packs 158 pairs of knickers

A WOMAN taking a shed load of clean underwear for a short break in the Cotswolds is not sure why, she has admitted.

Emma Howard has also packed 30 spare pairs of socks, 16 pairs of shoes but just one bra.
Howard said: “I suppose on some level I must be terrified of running out of clean underwear.

“But I only have one bra and I haven’t washed it since 2012.”

She added: “You just never know when you might need more than 13 dozen pairs of pants. Especially in the Cotwolds. Anything could happen out there.”

Emma’s husband, Tom said: “It’s so weird because I’m pretty sure that at home she only wears one pair of knickers a day. Yet when we go away she takes enough to last months.

“I can only imagine she is planning on pissing herself a lot in the Cotswolds.”