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Man in great mood can’t tell anyone it’s because he’s scored coke

A MAN in an uncharacteristically buoyant mood is unable to tell his colleagues it is due to having scored two grams of cocaine for the weekend.

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Celebrities you like all dying because you’re getting old, say experts

THIS year’s spate of celebrity deaths is because you, and all the famous people you like, are getting old, experts have confirmed.

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