Someone talks about something else

SOMEONE has briefly changed the subject, it has been confirmed.

Martin Bishop, from Stevenage, revealed that he talked about something else for around 90 seconds last night.

Bishop said: “My girlfriend Emma and I were walking to our local Italian restaurant, obviously discussing the potential Tory leadership candidates and how they would conduct Brexit negotiations.

“This continued as we were shown to our table and were handed the menus.

“Then all of a sudden I said that I hadn’t had chicken cacciatore for a while and Emma said that sounded really nice. And then we had an intense discussion about the exact tone of the second half of Jean Claude Juncker’s statement, while contrasting it with Angela Merkel’s pragmatism.”

He added: “It felt weird and wrong to talk about something else, so I don’t think we’ll be doing that again.”

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Corbyn denies rumour that he is leader of the Labour Party

JEREMY Corbyn has denied ‘malicious’ claims that he is leader of the Labour Party.

The Islington MP insisted it was ‘gossip from the Westminster bubble’ and pledged to carry on not being the Labour Party leader until the next general election at the earliest.

In a speech in London he said: “I don’t know who the Labour leader is. No one does. And that is the way it should be.

“The leader of the Labour Party is an idea, not a person. It is a concept, not a name, or a face, or a brain.”

He added: “The leader of the Labour Party does not campaign or say things to people. It exists solely in our imaginations, like a unicorn that’s not particularly fussed about the EU.”