BUOYED by his record of incredible electoral success in the Islington area, Jeremy Corbyn has launched an as-yet-nameless political party. What would you call it?
Lauren Hewitt, cereal farmer: “It’s a good thing you said political party, otherwise I’d have assumed he was behind the decks for one of his legendary warehouse raves.”
Lucy Parry, hairdresser: “How about the All-Gaza, Oddly-Not-So-Much-Ukraine Party to really put his priorities out in front?”
Olly O’Connor, bassist: “Charlie’s Spunky Monkey and the Spiral Planetary System? We’re not using it as our band name since we split last week so he’s welcome to it.”
Roy Hobbs, itinerant knife-sharpener: “The Seven MP Army to capitalise on his famous White Stripes chant. He only has five MPs, but that just highlights how loveably inept with numbers he is.”
Donna Sheridan, miniature village security consultant: “He should bury the hatchet and get Theresa May in it too. Really cash in on the Brexit nostalgia craze sweeping Gen Z.”
