What’s it about?
Widely regarded as the cultural capital of Ireland, this beautiful city boasts a rich history and proud identity, all of which has been entirely eclipsed by Ed Sheeran’s Galway Girl.
If the thought of bumping into a ginger bloke’s one-night stand who inspired a crime against music appeals, then why not come to take advantage of the truly lax attitudes local authorities take toward drinking in public? Soon you’ll be making equally poor decisions.
Any good points?
In comparison to Ireland’s other large urban areas, Galway is far more affordable, due in large part to lack of access to an international airport. Once you’re here you won’t be leaving quickly.
Situated on the edge of the Atlantic Ocean, Galway has some of the best seafood in the world. Enjoy convincing yourself that ready access to mussels is worth spending 90 per cent of the year indoors sheltering from the massive ocean storms that batter the city.
During the summer the streets in the Latin Quarter are filled with a plethora of buskers playing traditional music late into the night. If you’re excited by dozens of bearded septuagenarians with tin whistles serenading you as you pass, this is a major plus. Otherwise it’s just culturally-excused noise pollution.
A huge number of working poets live in Galway. Consider the status of poets in today’s society and whether you would wish to be among them before visiting.
Wonderful landscape?
With the wilderness of Connemara a short drive west, you’re within spitting distance of more bogland than you know what to do with. There’s very little to be done with big muddy fields that you can drown in.
On the other hand, if you like being stuck in a traffic jam on a regional road because some sheep are ambling about the central divide, you’ll be in heaven. It’ll make a marvellous postcard. It makes for sheer driving frustration and possibly death, because those sheep really don’t understand the rules of the road. And if you want to write off your car against something more substantial, there are wild ponies.
Hang out at…
If you’ve ever wondered whether it was possible to eat a burger while simultaneously drunkenly fingering someone you’ve just met, why not head to Supermac’s on Eyre Square?
The Spanish Arch is a bit of old wall left to commemorate the fact that Spanish sailors used to come to Galway to sell wine and impregnate locals before pissing off again because they couldn’t stand the weather. Today, the Spanish Arch is the meeting point for some of the city’s more grizzled residents to drink cans of discount cider at noon.
The centre of Galway’s cultural night life is undoubtedly the Róisín Dúbh pub. With a nightly showcase of music, poetry and comedy, it’s full of infuriating, fanny-pack wearing American tourists who expect you to be thrilled that one of their great-etcetera-uncles lived here 150 years ago.
Where to buy?
If you’ve a sincere desire to live surrounded by posh Dubliners who’ve migrated west in search of cheaper property after ruining the capital, check out Salthill. While you’ll be resented by locals for contributing to gentrification, at least you’ll have an aquarium on your doorstep.
From the streets:
Lauren Hewitt, aged 34, said: “Why the f*** are the streets not paved? I’m sueing the council if I sprain my ankle walking in heels on shitting cobbles again.”
Tom Logan, former Londoner, says: “I wake up everyday and berate myself for moving to a city with weather so inhospitable not even trees can survive.”
