Your astrological week ahead, with Psychic Bob

Aries, March 21st–April 19th

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The Archbishop of Canterbury on... Robert Jenrick's new low in Satanic fucking scumsucking

WAKING up with just the faintest hint of a morning head, I sweep aside the array of empty rum bottles on my bed and reach for my mobile telephone. Clicking on ‘Twitter’, I notice that I am, to use the parlance, ‘trending’.

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