Are Lineker's shirts the tightest in football history?

GARY Lineker’s form-hugging shirts have been hailed as the tightest ever worn by a football presenter.

Some experts even believe the former-England striker’s shirts may be even tauter across the chest than those worn by the legendary Malcom ‘Big Mal’ Allison during the 1970 tournament.

Football historian Roy Hobbs said: “The past eight World Cups have been characterized by free-flowing clothing that has left even die-hard fans reaching for the remote. Brazil 2014 is different. The tightness is back.

“There have been some great tight shirt moments over the years, Ray Stubbs in USA ’94, for example. And people will always  talk about Barry Venison’s contours.

“But I literally can’t take my eyes off the TV for fear of missing a side-seam splitting.”

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I am on the hunt for new ways of getting high

Dear Holly,

I’m at a bit of a dead end. Having tried pretty much all the drugs, I am on the hunt for new ways of getting high. Legal is probably best, considering I am the mayor of Toronto.

Rob Ford


Dear Rob,

There is nothing more exhilarating than the rush you get rolling bodily down a grassy hill in summertime; being chased down the back alleys by an angry Jack Russell; or playing knock-down ginger with a bunch of your best friends. Or at least, that’s what my dad would have you believe. Sadly, he is stuck in a timewarp and talks total nonsense. If you really want to get high you should drink three blue raspberry Slush Puppies in quick succession and then sit back and enjoy the ride.

Hope that helps!