Sunday, 25th October 2020

Scotland now in danger of losing to fictional countries

THE Scottish national football team is now the underdog against a range of made-up countries.

Following a 3-0 defeat to Kazakhstan, Scotland fans are now dreading matches against places that exist only in literature or fantasy role playing games.

Bill McKay, from Edinburgh, said: “Ruritania, Lilliput and the druids from beyond the Ultra-Forest of Kwang must be relishing the prospect.

“At this point we need a fictional manager. I’d like us to show a bit of ambition and approach Eleven from Stranger Things.”

Current Scotland manager Alex McLeish said: "There are no minnows in world football anymore, even if their most popular sport is horseback sword-fighting.”

He added: "We did force the keeper to make an above average save."