Lifestyle

A WOMAN with a shiny new manicure has begun her countdown to smudging, chipping or generally ruining it.

A COUPLE in their 50s are throwing themselves into the local country & western scene with sodding cowboy hats and everything, it has emerged.

THE weekend’s here, and if you don’t get the kids out of the house then you’ll end up strangling at least one of them.

A MOTHER judges her children’s playdates to have gone well if she has consumed at least two large glasses of wine.

EMPTY-NESTER parents have told their adult children not to move back home because they never liked them and they were a mistake.

A MAN has convinced his wife that they need to upgrade their car with his automotive soothsayer abilities.  

GETTING into a tub of tepid water with another human being always results in  disappointment, a couple have confirmed.

A MAN doing that balancing thing on his bike at the traffic lights does not want you to look at him because he is ‘doing it for practical reasons’.

A GROUP of middle class students are terribly excited to 'do' some weed, it has been confirmed.

A TWAT has announced that a single day is not enough for his birthday.