I’m feeling pretty upset. Not many people realise this, but life can be very cruel for a superstar racing driver with wads of cash and a massive flash car. Why don’t more people pity me?
You don’t know the meaning of the word ‘cruel’ until you have spent a few hours in the company of pre-pubescent school girls. If you find yourself in this situation, avoid becoming a target by ensuring you know all the lyrics to Let It Go from Frozen, that you have at least fifty loom bracelets on each arm and that no-one knows your mum signed you up for orchestra summer club, because otherwise untold dreadful things will happen to you.
Hope that helps!