Elderly man dies after brief bout of amateur dramatics

AN 82-YEAR-OLD man has passed away after a brief bout of amateur dramatics, it has been confirmed.

Norman Steele, who worked most of his life as an engineer, passed away peacefully after three weeks at the Norwich Playhouse as ‘someone’s dad’ in a new play written by one of the local theatre group.

Amateur theatre director Emma Bradford said: “Norman was a great actor and a lovely man.

“I’m rather assuming those things, as he’d only been to a handful of the rehearsals and he seemed more interested in making friends than actually taking on the complexities of this challenging new piece of work.

“He’ll be sorely missed and genuinely quite hard to re-cast at this point. Which is a bit annoying, to be honest.”

Steele’s daughter Donna said: “We had no idea he was even in a local play. Had we known he was at the point, we’d have made more effort to visit him.”

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We'll never argue like that, say couple who've been together for a month

A NEW couple have vowed they will never turn into one of those awful couples who snap and shout at each other.

Tom Logan and Helen Archer, who just celebrated their one-month ‘anniversary’, made the decision after spending an evening with friends who have been married for six years.

Archer said: “They didn’t seem in love at all. There were long stretches of silence that they didn’t fill with excitable chatter or endless questions about each other’s lives.

“They weren’t constantly snogging or touching each other inappropriately under the table. If our relationship ever becomes that stale and lifeless, just take us out and shoot us.

“They kept having arguments, like when Stephen wanted to order a pizza and Nikki said she wasn’t sure instead of instantly agreeing with him. Tom and I always agree. That’s what love is.”

Logan said: “They had a really tense conversation about his mother visiting where Nikki rolled her eyes. Helen would never do something like that to me. I felt sorry for them.”

Archer added: “That’s a bit harsh.”

Logan replied: “No it isn’t. Stop trying to undermine me. I love you.”