ADMINISTRATOR Wayne Hayes is eagerly waiting to feel the benefits of Britain’s economic growth.
Hayes believes the increase in UK output will result in him becoming wealthier, having to work less hard and possibly gaining the love of a beautiful woman.
He said: “I know the so-called ‘trickle down effect’ is going to come any day now, and when it does I’m quids in.
“There’s no way my boss isn’t going to share the wealth, after all I’m only on 13k at the minute which he must feel pretty bad about.
“I’m not sure whether they pay the money straight into my account, or whether pound coins literally trickle through the roof like water from a burst pipe.
“Probably I will pocket the initial massive pay rise then move on to one of the exciting new jobs created by the upturn, like horror film director or test pilot.”
He added: “I told my hot friend Liz we should go out for a meal to celebrate the rise in industrial productivity but she said no. She’ll soon change her tune when I get my Ferrari.”