A MERE 23 years ago, it was impossible to achieve fame without being a dickhead. The 90s spawned these monsters:
Chris Evans
What precisely was the appeal? ‘Wackiness’ and ‘zaniness’? A less-bad version of Steve Wright’s ‘posse’? Crowing about making so many millions he could just skive off with a hangover when he felt like it? Not as hateful as Moyles, but unquestionably a twat, as proved by his fondness for the ultimate twat accessory – a ridiculously large collection of sports cars.
Chris Moyles
Moyles proved that ‘fat twat’ was not merely what people referred to him as, it was an actual career. Somehow he got paid for a string of tedious controversies sparked by his boorish crap, such as discussing pissing in the shower and calling women who did it ‘dirty whores’ on his breakfast show. The Charlotte Church incident was by far the creepiest, and he may as well have just had a wank live on air while you ate your boiled egg.
Russell Brand
Brand technically hit the big time in the 2000s, but he was learning his craft as a twat in the 90s. His stand-up was soon displaced by tiresome shagging stories, a shit book and the agonisingly embarrassing Andrew Sachs incident which only severe head trauma will erase. Still apparently unaware he was a twat, Russell then had a deep political awakening, in which he discovered completely new concepts like distributing wealth more fairly.
Guy Ritchie
It’s not so much Ritchie personally, although statistically speaking he is likely to be a twat, more his awful legacy. Lock, Stock etc. was insulting public school mockney bollocks in its own right, but more importantly opened a Pandora’s box of bad films. If you ever spent an evening watching the unwatchable Triads, Yardies and Onion Bhajis because your mate ‘thought it looked good’ in Blockbuster, the trail of blame can be traced directly back to one Guy Stuart Ritchie.
David Baddiel
Not a horrible twat, more just a twat. After some decent comedy, Baddiel got on board the 1990s lad culture bandwagon with Fantasy Football League, a natural career choice for a middle-class Cambridge Footlights alumnus. This has come back to haunt him due to the ‘pineapple on his head’ taunts directed at striker Jason Lee. The blackface didn’t help either, especially as Baddiel had just hopped on the anti-Corbyn bandwagon to campaign against anti-semitism.
Richard Littlejohn
Littlejohn became Britain’s highest-paid columnist in the 90s, thanks to his shit columns obsessed with homosexuality, WW2 and ‘PC gone mad’. However he did prove that people are willing to read near-identical articles several times a week if they reinforce their vile opinions. Truly a great discovery, and now something being emulated by every reactionary pundit from Piers Morgan to the cursed souls on GB News. So thanks for that, Littlejohn, you twat.
