Woman marries Ant and Dec

A WOMAN unknowingly married Ant and Dec in a polygamous wedding ceremony in Newcastle.

Bride Ali Astall believed she was marrying either Ant or Dec, only to discover at the end of the ceremony that both presenters were now her husbands.

The Saturday Night Takeway hosts told a shocked Astall of their boyhood agreement to do everything together, including marrying the same woman.

But after her initial horror, Astall admitted it made sense, adding: “I’ve always been attracted to either Ant or Dec.  Now I have found my other two thirds.”

Reverend Bill McKay, who officiated the ceremony, said: ”Some might call a three-person marriage unnatural, but  separating Ant and Dec would be far more unnatural.”

After the ceremony, Ant and Dec addressed guests with pre-scripted, family-friendly banter, with Ant or Dec saying “There’s three people in this marriage,” and Dec or Ant adding  “If you count the bride!”, until they broke for adverts.

The trio also confirmed that they will have equal custody over their large-foreheaded children, who will grow up to have cheeky grins.