Met Office thanks your dad for Facebook weather updates

THE Met Office has thanked your dad for keeping people up-to-date with the weather via Facebook.

A spokesman said: “His near-daily posts on the temperature, wind and likelihood of rain in his local area offer a valuable service to his 167 friends, who would otherwise be left to get the forecast from the television, internet or a newspaper.”

The Met Office also praised your dad’s jaunty, engaging tone, as typified in today’s post: “Chance of SNOW this week but maybe just rain! Don’t get the sledge out yet!!!”

No mention was made of his inconsistent use of hashtags, which he is yet to fully understand.

Analysis of your dad’s profile found that he has a higher level of social media engagement than other weather channels, often inspiring scores of comments from family members and his friends from the pub.

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Trump replaces son-in-law with son

PRESIDENT-ELECT Trump has placated critics by replacing son-in-law Jared Kushner as senior adviser with his 10-year-old son, Barron Trump. 

The 70-year-old said he perfectly understood criticism of his earlier appointment, given that Kushner is “not even a blood Trump.”

He continued: “Fair. Okay, media? Fair point. The guy’s an in-law. He married my daughter but he doesn’t have genetic greatness. I accept that.

“Little Barron may just be a boy but I’d made my first million by his age, he’s pure Trump 100 per cent, and he’s easily as mature and stable as I am.

“He’s great at the cyber, he likes holding onto the nuclear button when I’m tweeting, and he’s gonna be so incredible at beating ISIS it’ll make your head spin.”

Barron said: “I like the army men. Let’s make the army men have a really big war.”