Monday, 20th January 2020

Fancy man eats vegetables

A FANCY man eats vegetables for lunch, it has emerged.

Tom Logan expresses his moral and social superiority through the diverse palette of colours on his plate.

Logan said: “I don’t see what the big deal is. I’m just eating quinoa and lentils with a mix of grilled veggies.

“It’s not my problem if you guys don’t know what sweet potatoes are. Good luck living your life without batch cooking.”

Logan’s friend Martin Bishop said: “Look at Mr Fancyman, mindfully enjoying his aubergine so he can clean out his body from toxins or whatever.

“What’s for pudding, fancyman? A nectarine? Piss off.”