THE international body regulating the worldwide production and sale of tofu have called an urgent summit to solve the mystery of tofu.
The Council have narrowed its possible origins down to just seven or eight potential substances, with a further thirty-five in the ‘maybe’ pile.
Chairwoman Dr Helen Archer said “Tofu is white, soft and definitely made of something. Maybe it’s some type of sea cucumber, or a pulp of vegetable ends.
“It’s completely natural unless it’s entirely synthetic and there’s an abundance of it, unless world supplies are about to be exhausted.
“Perhaps it comes from a bush, or underground springs. Or could there be such a thing as horse cheese?”
Treasurer Stephen Malley said: “As the global body for tofu, it’s time we nailed this once and for all. I think it’s eggs.”