BRITAIN’S grandmothers are concerned repeated heatwaves are tempting the foolish towards unhealthy chilled drinks and away from traditional scalding beverages.
Our wise elders have warned the country that even in today’s 33-degree temperatures, they should remember the best way to cool down is with a big mug of nice hot tea.
Grandmother of eight Margaret Gerving said: “Hydrating? My grandfather served 22 years in the British Raj, and he never hydrated once. He stuck to hot tea.
“I’m all for this keeping curtains and windows closed all day, though I don’t hold with this opening them at night. But why drink water when a freshly-brewed pot of Tetley’s is available? That’s quenching.
“We had summers twice as hot as this, popping tar bubbles and frying eggs in them, and the kettle was never off. Tea heats up the body which has a cooling effect, it’s common sense proved by top scientists like Heinz Wolff.
“Tea is the most suitable drink to consume in all weathers and for all occasions. If you’re fancy you can have coffee. Either way, remember the golden rule and keep it piping. Also, for lunch, think about a stew.”
Grandson Kayden Gerving said: “When I die I go to heaven, for I have already served my time in hell sipping tea at my nan’s house in 44 degree temperatures. With Tipping Point on.”