BRITONS have eagerly been buying unnecessary tat in the Amazon Prime sale. But which useless purchases are you going to regret most when you can’t afford food in a week’s time?
Cordless hoover – £280
Reduced by £50, this cordless vacuum cleaner seemed like an absolute bargain, even if your current hoover works perfectly well. This cordless alternative has a battery life of about three minutes and the suction power of a fly, but who cares at the low price of a return flight to New York?
75” OLED TV – £1,399.99
This 75” super HD TV provides you with an ultra-crisp unparalleled viewing experience – or at least it would if it fitted in your studio flat. An unwise purchase as you now look a bit common AND spendthrift, and you’re not a film buff or football fan so you’ll just be using it to watch Bake Off and Huw Edwards.
Electric toothbrush – £79.99
Paying two pounds for a toothbrush in the supermarket just isn’t extravagant enough. Down from £299, this magic wand brush promises you a Simon Cowell smile which lights the way on darkened country lanes. The only snag is that you’ll have to apply for a loan every time you want to buy replacement brush heads.
Lululemon sportswear – £162
Now you’ve tried them on, the ultra-tight exercise pants look slightly obscene. And they only had the Lululemon sports bra in extra small, so you look less like Jessica Ennis-Hill and more like a pork joint tied up in string. People will salivate over you at the gym, but only because they’re thinking of Sunday lunch.
100 Nespresso capsules – £20
This bulk purchase of Nespresso capsules was a steal at 20 quid so it’s unfortunate you don’t have a Nespresso machine to put them in. Pierce the lids with a knife and scoop the coffee directly into your mouth until your bank account has recovered sufficiently to buy one – probably next year’s Amazon Prime Day.