AN ENTIRE house has been forced to celebrate an unpopular housemate’s birthday because they are all stuck in with him.
Nathan Muir turns 28 today, a fact his four Bristol flatmates would normally have ignored completely but have been unable to because of COVID-19.
Julian Cook said: “It’s not that we don’t like Nathan. We just don’t know him well enough to be the only celebrants at his lonely lockdown birthday party.
“But there’s no excuse to get out of it, and we’re all here. Hannah pretended that’s why she made a cake yesterday, and Sean’s made a card we’ve all signed, and happy birthday Nathan I guess.”
Fellow housemate Simon agreed: “Normally I’d say ‘happy birthday’ in the morning, forget about it until the evening, then make an excuse not to go to the pub with him and his halfwit rugby mates.
“I asked why he doesn’t meet them on Zoom but he said he’d rather be with his ‘roomies’. He knows this is obligation, doesn’t he? He doesn’t think we’re his friends?”
Muir said: “I can’t believe I’m turning 28 in lockdown with these losers. Still, needs must.”