A MAN on a date night with his wife reckons that with the amount she is flirting and drinking his luck may well be in.
Nathan Muir initially attended the restaurant date night with wife Helen out of a sense of marital obligation, but he increasingly believes the evening will end with him getting some.
He said: “She touched my arm and gazed into my eyes while I was telling her a frankly boring anecdote about my mate Dave’s car stalling at a roundabout. This chick is hot to trot.
“I need to pace myself, make sure I’m still sober enough to perform, and look like I have no expectations. If I act like she’s a sure thing, that’ll slam the doors tight shut.
“I’ve also got to keep the keep the tone light but sexy, ask open questions, and let her think it’s her decision. But I don’t mind saying I’m pretty excited. It’s been months. I hope she lets us do it with the lights on.
“So glad I made the effort by shaving and getting her to iron me a shirt.”
Heather Muir added: “I’m only doing this because I’m lonely and horny. God I’ll regret shagging my husband in the morning.”