Saturday, 7th December 2019

Man thinks it's cool to say his girlfriend lets him do things

A MAN is under the impression it is cool to pretend his girlfriend is the boss of him.

Wayne Hayes frequently says things like “I’ll have to check with the missus” and “I’ll see if I’m allowed” even though his partner does not really care what he gets up to.

Hayes, 33, said: “I’ve been given permission to to go for a drink with my mate Paul on Saturday. Looks like I’m off the leash!”

However Hayes’ partner Nikki Hollis said: “I’ve overheard Wayne saying he needs to ask me before going out for a drink. No, he doesn’t. He’s a grown man. I’ve no idea where he gets this from.”

Friends verified that Hayes’ actions make him seem immensely feeble and somehow chauvinistic at the same time. They went on to say that, after asking him, it turned out he had never not been allowed to do things.

Hayes added: “It’s cool to seem like a cuckold and act like you’re in fear of your girlfriend. I’ve seen it on classic American sitcoms so it must be true.”