Man uses ‘alternative arrangements’ to stop wife discovering he’s shagging her best mate

A MAN has voted for ‘alternative arrangements’ to allow him to continue having sex with his wife’s best friend without his wife finding out. 

Tom Booker, who has been sleeping with Emma Bradford for eight months, was given the choice of ending the affair or coming clean but instead opted for an unspecified ‘alternative’. 

He said: “Nobody can tell me I haven’t made a decision. I have, and a very decisive one. 

“I can’t be honest about the affair because my wife wouldn’t like it, and I can’t finish it because I wouldn’t like that, so what I’ve done is choose a visionary third way that gives everybody what they want. 

“What the alternative arrangements will be exactly I’m not sure yet. They’ll need to be secure to make sure we’re not discovered, so should probably involve technology. It’s very good, that technology. 

“I can’t wait to tell Emma the news. I’ll go over tonight. The wife’s expecting me home, but now we’ve got this arrangements thing I don’t need to worry about any of that.” 

Bradford said: “Yeah, at first it seemed a remote possibility, but he’s definitely going to get his cock chopped off.”