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Six unconvincing excuses for getting in touch with someone you're trying to shag

‘HEY, had a good winter?’ You don’t care. You just want to know if they’re still with that knobhead. These are the weak excuses you’ll use for contact out of the blue: 

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Couple fundamentally too lazy to cheat on each other

A COUPLE know that they will always be faithful to one another because neither can be arsed having an affair. 

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