MUM is messaging and the emojis are flowing but her choices are utterly baffling. Here’s what she’s really trying to say:
‘Call me’ hand
She scrolled for a long time for that thumbs up symbol you always use and stumbled across this one. She now uses it constantly as it saves her spending four minutes trying to type out ‘ok’. Fear not, she’s not expecting you to call her. Well, she is, constantly, but that’s not what she’s trying to communicate in this instance.
‘Loudly crying’ face
She’s aiming for tears of laughter and, without her glasses on, this looks a lot like it. No need to put her right as hysterical weeping will often make sense as a response from her, like when your dad makes yet another awful joke on the family WhatsApp or you send over a funny video of your young child saying ‘f**k’ instead of ‘duck’.
She thinks the cringe face is grinning and uses it as an indicator of pure joy and excitement. Got a promotion? Cringe. Sent a picture of your new car? Cringe. The news that you’re getting married? Cringe. Actually, that one was correct as she really does not like your partner.
Blind man with stick
She uses this one frequently to say that Dad is out playing golf, which indicates both her level of knowledge of the game and her interest in it. Mind you, she uses the flamenco dancing woman to signal she’s off to aerobics, so perhaps she just sees the world through a different lens to other people.
Oh, for goodness’ sake, she’s making a veggie curry when you go round tonight and wants to make sure you like the ingredients, so stop sending back laughing emojis. The point you need to get embarrassed is when she accidentally sends you a message intended for your dad that ends with the rocket followed by the spurting whale.