SOME things are far too popular considering everyone claims to despise them. Unless they’re all lying about loathing these hate magnets.
Few things make eyes roll harder than when a conversation veers towards podcasts. Who cares if you’ve just listened to a 13-part series where two washed-up comedians talk about their favourite episodes of Frasier? Lots of people clearly give a shit though because it’s shooting up the Apple podcast chart.
The BBC is either a corrupt government mouthpiece or a woke asylum obsessed with box-ticking, depending on your worldview. It’s very existence is an affront to life itself, but you’ll still plonk yourself down every evening for the news at 10 just like the rest of us. And it’s got the huge selling point of being marginally less shit than some of the crap on Netflix and Disney Plus.
Everyone agrees that endlessly scrolling through the news and bullshit opinions from random morons can’t be good for your health. None of us has got the balls to delete social media from our phones though, meaning we’ll stay glued to these dopamine dispensers for the rest of our lives. It’s a depressing existence, but you might see a good meme once in a while. You know, like Captain Picard facepalming. Something very current and witty.
Call Boris Johnson a twat in a public space and you can guarantee everyone will nod their head in agreement and say how useless he is. Oddly though, when the election rolls around this contempt manifests itself as a landslide majority. It’s as if we secretly like bumbling Etonian pricks who [insert any of about 200 serious character flaws that make him unsuitable to be PM].
Urgh, men. If they’re not lording it over everyone with their privilege they’re being boozy bores who like Formula 1. Even men hate men, which is pretty good going. The male population isn’t exactly dying out though, so someone clearly likes them enough to shag them. And that ‘someone’ is women, the bloody hypocrites. They’re still better than men though.