Britons descend on Riyadh with average cars

HUNDREDS of Britons have made the annual trip to Saudi Arabia to show off their average cars.

Every year British car owners flock to Saudi capital Riyadh to cruise around in their their mid-range and secondhand vehicles.

Shop assistant Stephen Malley said: “Everyone’s eyes were popping out on stalks. I don’t think they’d ever seen an 11-year-old Nissan Micra.

“I pulled a few cool moves, like winding open the manual sunroof and parking comfortably in an extremely small space.”

Teacher Donna Sheridan said: “My Volvo 850 estate gets a lot of attention. Yesterday an Arab playboy in a Lamborghini asked me where he could get a car with enough room for children, wives and a big weekly shop.”

Meanwhile, Saudi authorities warned that the city is not to be used as a private racetrack, after a late-night contest between a Honda Civic and a 1992 Ford Scorpio.

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Everyone thinks their baby or kitten could be a model

ALL owners of babies or kittens are convinced they would be perfect for lucrative advertising work.

Researchers at the Institute for Studies found that every parent or cat owner is convinced they are raising a potential gold mine.

Professor Henry Brubaker said: “Billions of people have considered taking a picture of their kid or kitten and sending it to whichever scary multinational company makes its food.

“It’s best not to bother as you are deluding yourself. It looks like all the others.”

Mother Donna Sheridan said: “I thought my eight-month old son was the cutest baby in the world.

“Turns out he’s just the cutest baby in my house.”