Man’s gift wrapping attempt injures 14

FOURTEEN people have been injured by a man’s attempt to wrap Christmas presents.

Gift wrapper Tom Logan was the most seriously injured and is now in intensive care in Peterborough General Hospital where his condition is described as ‘freakishly mangled’.

Logan’s sister Helen Archer said: “He accidentally cut our mum, quite badly, with the scissors, and my eldest daughter got so tangled in tape she looked like a chrysalis.

“His attempt to wrap a cookbook led to the partial collapse of the staircase. And then there was the ribbon. We told him ribbons were not remotely necessary, but he’s such an arrogant bastard.”

The family believes the largest parcel, approximately the size of a Renault Clio, will take two days to unwrap and will probably contain a little box of Clarins eye make-up.

Meanwhile, it is understood Logan’s presents from his girlfriend will be wrapped with such angular precision that they will lacerate his hands.