Government unveils confidence-boosting invasion of Andorra

THE government is planing to invade the tiny nation of Andorra to rebuild national pride.

Hoping to erase memories of England’s World Cup campaign and rugby defeats against New Zealand, a plan has been drawn up to conquer the landlocked nation, which is rich in ski supplies and cane furniture.

A government spokesman said: “For years the Andorrans have been our bitterest enemies, flaunting their wool clothing and energetic folk dances.

“Seeing our tanks roll through the streets of whatever their capital is called will be better than any sporting trophy.

“The World Cup is shit anyway, it looks like an alien holding a satsuma.”