Thursday, 29th October 2020

Bloke only successful because he works 90-hour weeks like a dickhead

THE millionaire CEO of a software business owes all his success to tirelessly working 90 hours a week like the total dickhead he is.

JOSEPH Turner never gets pissed watching telly, never goes to the cinema, never kicks back or relaxes and has become very wealthy, which is supposedly his reward.

Brother Andy Turner said: “Sure, he’s got millions. But it’s not like he really deserves it.

“How hard can it be when you’re only making that money by working three times more than everyone else? I’d be rich if I earned three times my salary.

“All he’s done is sacrifice his leisure time, never take a day off, think about work every waking moment and focus all his energy on it for 20 years. To my mind that’s cheating.

“Who does he think he is? Up at five in the morning for meditation before going on a one-hour walk like he’s the founder of f**king Twitter.

“I could also work hard to become rich and powerful, but I don’t because I’m not an insufferable arsehole.”