A WOMAN who has been absent on medical leave has return to the office with, to her co-workers’ surprise, significantly larger breasts.
Colleagues of Sophie Rodriguez are not sure how to broach the subject of her enlarged bosoms while feeling that it would be rude to say nothing.
Data analyst Tom Logan said: “Right. Thought it was a weird time for a holiday. Should we send a ‘congratulations’ card around, or what?
“I’m aware that commenting on a size of a co-workers’ boobs is frowned upon in these Me Too times, but you don’t go up to what we’re conservatively estimating is a D-cup and expect it to go unnoticed. Is ‘I think it’s great you’ve done that for yourself’ too polite?
“But cosmetic surgery’s not a new hairstyle. And I fear saying ‘ooh, I see you’ve had your jugs done, and just in time for Christmas’ might have me up before HR.”
Campaigns manager Helen Archer agreed: “We can’t ignore it entirely. She’s had to have her chair adjusted and I dread to think of her photocopying. But saying ‘Love your new massive badonkaidoinks, how much were they?’ seems inappropriate, even at lunch.
“Perhaps I’ll just motorboat her on the next night out. That should break the ice nicely.”
