AN outright pointless Monday meeting did not even contain enough substance to have made it as an email, attendees have confirmed.
Employees summoned to the hour-long meeting were expecting it to be a lengthy presentation of information that could have been summarised in three paragraphs, but instead discovered it was not even that.
Project manager Nikki Hollis said: “After 40 minutes of preamble we began wrapping up. My pen was still poised over my pad. Not one mark had it made.
“If this meeting were an email it would run out of steam after saying ‘Dear all’. But at least you could politely delete it unread. This required us all to be present to nod along to other people nodding along.
“Shit, everyone’s looking at me. I better spout some bollocks about how cutting back on inefficiences could help us hit our KPIs in Q3. That always gets people off your back.”
Boss and meeting organiser Martin Bishop said: “It was meandering, inane and unnecessary but it reinforced that I’m the boss.
“I expect you all to work through lunch to make up for this lost time.”
