EXPLORERS have discovered the world’s first non-toxic workplace, which until now was believed to be a myth.
After following a series of arcane clues and paddling down a river in a canoe, explorers have finally found an office which is not simmering with passive-aggressive hostility or being run by heartless managers.
Expedition leader Roy Hobbs said: “I was beginning to think a non-toxic workplace was the stuff of legend, like Atlantis. But after days of hacking through the underbrush, there they were – a group of young professionals merrily sending emails and making photocopies.
“Everyone appeared motivated, and you could tell from the way nobody looked burnt-out that the company encouraged a good work-life balance. People were even using the breakout area to relax without fear of reprisal.
“When we made contact with their head of department they presented us with a homemade cake they’d bought in, and even invited us to the drinks they were having after work. It was like nobody was tainted by the pressures of modern corporate life.
“I’m worried we might have corrupted them though with our accounts of offices in the outside world. By the end of the week they’ll be bitching, glumly eating soggy tuna sandwiches at their desks and taking more holiday than they’re entitled to.”
