Brexit advent calendar has something bad behind every door

PEOPLE who bought a Brexit advent calendar have discovered it goes on forever and every door conceals an unpleasant surprise.

As well as poor-quality gifts, the calendar has thousands of days to represent future trade negotiations, causing the ‘fun’ festive activity to drag on tediously.

Office manager Martin Bishop said: “We’d expected nice patriotic gifts like some luxury British chocolate, but when I opened today’s door there was just a crappy plastic figure of Andrea Leadsom.  

“On the 14th there was actually some chocolate, but it was that weird American type that tastes slightly greasy. Then on the 19th there was a small wooden banana. I’m not sure what I’m meant to do with that.”

Fellow calendar owner Donna Sheridan said: “My Brexit advent calendar just goes on day after day with no end in sight. I’m getting sick of the whole thing.

“I wouldn’t mind so much if the gifts were any good, but on Tuesday there was just a picture of Liam Fox. I had to go out and buy my young daughter a Freddo to stop her crying.

“And I’m not sure who would want a tiny blue passport that doesn’t serve any particular purpose.”