May visits Wales in bid to discover the point of it

THE prime minister has returned to Wales to make one last attempt at working out if there is any point in it even being there. 

Theresa May visited Wales after realising that Scotland and Northern Ireland were not only different from England but in their own way important, and reasoning that surely Wales must be the same.

She said: “Nah. Still don’t get it.

“It’s a whole country, technically, so you’d think it’d have its own political issues and parties and, I don’t know, stuff. Things you’d have to pay attention to if you were running the country. But not really.

“You cross the border and it seems distinctive with the bilingual signs and everything, but then it’s largely unpopulated and is either seaside, mountains or these tiny little cities.

“I thought they might be helpful for Brexit since they voted for it, but apparently they’re not really sure and mostly vote Labour or this party I’ve never heard of called Plaid Cymru. Four MPs. Makes the Lib Dems look big.

“Imagine an entire country you can safely ignore. There is one. It’s called Wales.”