'I only went to the execution to be polite,' he says, coming back from Saudi with piss all

‘The beheadings threw me off,’ he said. ‘I only went along to be polite. You know what they’re like about hospitality. And, well, I couldn’t eat my partridge on the plane home.’

This is a Mash Premium article, exclusively for subscribers. Sign up for Mash Premium to get ad-free browsing and bonus content.

Mash Premium gives you extra content and ad-free browsing. Subscribe to view this article.

‘The beheadings threw me off,’ he said. ‘I only went along to be polite. You know what they’re like about hospitality. And, well, I couldn’t eat my partridge on the plane home.’

Take in a Ukranian refugee? No thanks. Instead, I shall open my home to the cancelled

Anyone taking in a Ukranian family – they’re as genuine as Sylvanian Families, and five times the price – is a fool who deserves everything they get.

This is a Mash Premium article, exclusively for subscribers. Sign up for Mash Premium to get ad-free browsing and bonus content.

Mash Premium gives you extra content and ad-free browsing. Subscribe to view this article.

Anyone taking in a Ukranian family – they’re as genuine as Sylvanian Families, and five times the price – is a fool who deserves everything they get.

Sorry, this article is for Mash Premium members only
Subscribe Now or Sign In