Dear Holly,
I’m all excited that I finally get to question the Donald as part of my ongoing investigation. But I’m a bit worried I’m going to make an arse of it so I am trying to devise some killer questions in advance. So far I’ve come up with, “President Trump, what is it like being such a colossal, racist, orange fuckwit?”, but beyond that I have hit a bit of a wall. Any suggestions?
Robert Mueller
Washington DC
Dear Robert,
Generally speaking, grown-ups don’t like it when you ask them questions. They go all red and fidgety and try to change the subject, especially if you ask them “where do babies come from?” or “why was daddy kissing that strange lady in Asda car park while you were visiting granny in the home?” or ” why does my brother have different coloured skin from the rest of the family?” Funnily enough, no-one seems up for answering those sorts of questions and might even give you a clip round the ear if you ask too many of them.
Hope that helps!
Holly