Is it okay to hate vegans because of what they eat? Yes, or of course not you utter moron?

IS IT okay to hate someone because they don’t eat the same food as you do? Or should you just mind your own fucking business?

You’re in a restaurant and you overhear someone say ‘Is it OK for vegans?’ How do you respond?

A. Couldn’t give a shit.

B. I turn around in my chair, look them up and down and then shake my head, while muttering to myself, ‘Is this what people died in wars for?’

A friend is bringing their vegan partner to dinner. How do you respond?

A. Cool. Tell us what they like and we’ll get it for them.

B. You flip over your coffee table, set fire to the curtains and then go outside into the street and scream, ‘Not in this house!’.

You see someone in the supermarket looking at vegan food. How do you react?

A. Couldn’t give a shit.

B. You hurl tins of beans at them while pointing and making some sort of guttural screaming sound. You then chase them from the store before sitting on the ground to chew on a big fuck-off bone like a werewolf.

Mostly As: Couldn’t give a shit.

Mostly Bs: Me love meat. No eat meat bad. And yes, it is my business what you put into your body.

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Death metal fan sure everyone would love it if they just gave it a chance

A FAN of death metal, as well as black, speed and ‘doom’ metal, is confident everyone would enjoy it as much as he does if they just gave it a go. 

Tom Logan, who listens exclusively to metal and metal variants, believes that because people are put off by the genre’s macho image they do not realise how accessible it truly is.

He said: “Take a band like Wolves In The Throne Room. Black metal, yes, but their interest in the occult is more sophisticated than outdated Satanism and the musicianship is absolutely incredible.

“A track like I Will Lay Down My Bones Among The Rocks And Roots may be 18 minutes of frenzied shredding, crashing drums and guttural screams but lyrically it’s really peaceful. It relaxes me.

“And Cannibal Corpse’s Heads Shoveled Off is about a Vietnam veteran turned serial murderer so, as I explained to my stepdad, it’s practically a twin to Billy Joel’s Goodnight Saigon. 

“It’s a shame more people don’t have open minds. Honestly, Ritual Necromancy could be the next One Direction.”

Girlfriend Jo Kramer said: “It all sounds the same; loud, thrashy, screaming, shit. But I have a thing for big blokes with beards.”