A MAN who was forced to accompany his other half to a dance class has kickstarted an affair to get his own back.
Ryan Whittaker was made to attend a salsa session by girlfriend Lucy Parry, who refused to listen to his pleas of ineptitude and complete lack of interest.
Whittaker said: “Lucy loves Strictly, but she knows I hate it and never watch, aside from a brief ogle of the female dancers in their skimpy costumes.
“So a salsa class was always going to be a nightmare. As soon as the teacher said ‘Let’s get those hips moving’, I knew I was f**ked. I’ve never felt so out of place in my life.
“Then Lucy started laughing at me, so when the teacher offered to help and I found myself clamped crotch-to-crotch with this Argentinian beauty, I saw a chance to get my own back.
“Graciela and I have been seeing each for the past few weeks. I’m not kidding myself that it’s going to last, as the woman can do things with her body that are deserving of a far superior dick to mine.
“Is an affair an overreaction? No. You try experiencing the humiliation of trying to do the New York Walk in a draughty community hall when you could be watching John Wick. It’s a perfectly reasonable response.”
