Monday, 20th January 2020

Festival of Brexit cancelled due to everything about it

A FESTIVAL to promote Brexit has been cancelled because it was an incredibly terrible idea on every level, the organisers have revealed.

The event had been dogged by problems including administrative wrangles, performers pulling out and being the worst thing ever conceived by humanity.

Promoter Roy Hobbs said: “When your headline acts are an Elvis impersonator and three members of Bucks Fizz that’s not a festival, it’s just a weird dream.

“Not many Brexiters would have come anyway because a lot are elderly and think festivals are full of dirty hippies with Hendrix perms injecting heroin and saying ‘man’.”

Brexiter Donna Sheridan said: “I just don’t understand how a festival with Nigel Farage, an orchestra and some of Bucks Fizz could go wrong.

“It’s clearly a conspiracy by the EU because they want to destroy traditional English culture like Making Your Mind Up. ”